Beware the False Prophets of Junior Cricket

Peter Procopis | May 22, 2023

False Prophet: “Big fellaaa… how ya goin’ champ? Saw your young bloke the other day… looked alright… still just losing his shape a bit through here (gesticulates with the top hand of a cover drive). I’ve got some time next Thursday arvo…we can do some stuff before the Carnival. He’ll be right, mate; don’t worry. The Boys rate ’im… they rate his intent with the bat, and the spin revs on his Offies are elite, mate. They don’t care that he only lands two or three in each set… it’s all about the revs, mate.”

Dad: “Oh…okay Gibbo, yeah, right. He’s been going really well lately. He made 46 last week and 72 the week before. He’s confident and lovin’ it… but, yeah, if you think it’s important, let’s do it. Jane can drop him off after school. I’ll get her to put a hunjy and a pineapple in the side pocket of his kitbag for you.”

False Prophet: “Cool, big fella, no dramas. Yeah mate, runs are good, but they’re looking for other things too these days- next level stuff, mate. It’s about shape and being able to play this one (gesticulates using both hands for a sweep shot). They’ve got the data, mate… gotta be a beast on the sweep- absolute must if you want to be elite.”

Two hours later at home…

Dad: “Hey, mate, ran into Gibbo down at Seniors training.”

Son: “Which one’s he again, Dad?”

Dad: “Seriously, mate, c’mon, we’ve been through this three times now- he knows the key blokes; he’s important. He’s a Director or something of the Juniors and he does private coaching too. They reckon he puts names forward for those Pathway teams.”

Son: “Oh, yeah, I think I know which one he is… there are so many blokes that hang around, Dad. He’s the one that wears the State gear isn’t he…calls me big fella or champ? I’ve never understood that…why doesn’t he just call me by my name? Yeah, I’ve got it now, he’s the one I did that session with last year. We spent an hour on sweep shots- standard and reverse. I remember him saying stuff about the data, being elite and keeping my shape- he said a lot. Remember Dad, it was good for my sweeps, but I lost my forward defence and drives for a month. Remember those few weeks afterwards…we had to do work really hard to get my game back. That was tough… remember, Dad?”

Dad: “Yeah son, we had to get stuck in, didn’t we? But yep, you’re right, that’s Gibbo. Anyway, he watched you for a few minutes at training the other day and wants to work on your shape before the Carnival. It’s a great opportunity, mate; everyone says he’s important; and he always seems to be coaching someone on that ball machine.”

Son: “What does he mean by shape, Dad? I’ve never really understood that.”

Dad: “Yeah, I gotta be honest, mate, it’s a bit of a mystery to me too. Just when I think I get it, someone says something else, and I’m confused again. Anyway, listen mate, both Byron’s Dad and Murph reckon it’s important to get on Gibbo’s good side. He knows the right people, mate.”

Son: “Okay Dad… I just feel really good at the moment…best I’ve ever felt…I really don’t want to confuse things…just want to keep things clear and simple and keep scoring runs. And Dad, haven’t you’ve always said that batting is about keeping it simple and scoring runs.”

Dad: “Yep, that’s awesome, mate, but Gibbo’s important…he’s looped into the system. Scoring 118 runs over those last two innings is really good, but I reckon we need to build a relationship with Gibbo- he knows the elite stuff, mate, you know…like the Pathway and what the data says. You with me, son?